Sunday, January 18, 2015

Groundhog Dating

Online dating reminds me of the movie Groundhog Day. It's about a meteorologist who goes to Punxsutawney, Pennsylvania to report on the Ground Hog Day festival but the freeway gets snowed in and he’s trapped there. The next day it’s Groundhog Day again and everything repeats exactly the same and he can’t escape. He’s there for an indeterminate amount of time re-living the same day over and over and he’s the only one who’s aware of it.
How is this like online dating?

Because you have to have the SAME conversation with different guys over and over and over and over.
What do you do with your time?
What’s your family like?
What are your dreams?
What’s your favorite shows, music?
Why do you dress up your sister’s cat?

I’ve only been through three online dating resources: LDS Singles, Tinder, and LDS Planet. It was virtual suffering for me.
First of all, (I don’t browse the women so I don’t know what their mistakes are but here are my observations of the men) Many have HORRIBLE profile pictures.
They look like they used their mug shot from prison. Stony faced, cold, threatening.
Other’s use shots of them from a distance. Yeeeeah. Are you saying I want to keep my distance for your first impression?

Basically, a good rule of thumb, gents, is eliminate anything that could make a girl browsing your profile say: “There’s a reason why.”
He’s hiding his hair, “There’s a reason why.”
He has no close ups of his face, “There’s a reason why.”
Why does he weigh 300 pounds?  “There’s a reason why.”
Basically, solve your big issues before publishing yourself. Lose weight for yourself, though, not for someone else. If you couldn’t lose weight for yourself what makes you think you’re going to improve for your spouse once you put a ring on her?  If you’re having problems with being attractive, find styles that enhance your best features. They say there’s no such thing as ugly women just poor women, so what about the guys? If you’re losing your hair and it’s making dating difficult, then make your baldness work for you. Shave off the comb over, and assume a style that suits it. If you’re uncomfortable with your shiny dome then she will be too. A good example of a guy who does it right is Vin Diesel. He owns baldness.
Here, something with good tips from Google: DO your homework. Homework is the easy part. 

Dress alone can make or break success.
I heard a saying once: lingerie to men are suits to women. Which means, if panties on a woman make men swoon, a suit on a guy is going to make a woman swoon.

I’m not saying you have to dress up ALL the time, I’m talking about FIRST impressions. Because once you have her attention then she’ll probably like you in anything that doesn’t make you look like a total slob or hobo.
Like, once my grampa told my younger brother to wear a suit coat and he just wore it over a t-shirt. He had not only attention from girls but from impressed adults who commented on his snazziness.
It’s not hard to find solutions dudes. Women do it CONSTANTLY. Return the favor. 

What resulted in the happy ending for Phil Connors on Groundhog Day was interesting. After failed attempts to get the woman he had a crush on through many comedic methods, he tried to be exactly what she wanted in a man but she could tell it wasn’t real. He finally got her when he became a better man for his own sake then she fell in love with him because, incidentally, the best version of himself was exactly what she wanted.

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