Sunday, August 23, 2015

Prehistoric Monster Syndrome

Eve was told she would forever bear children in sorrow.By sorrow did they mean HULK?
Some women suffer from PMS more than others and I'm afraid that mine is bad enough that I can personify these moods. What's worse, is a few poor guys have had the misfortune of going out with me during these hazardous two week mood mutations.

I'm a huge fan of movies; my favorite parts of movies is a well made villain. The more terrifying or daunting a villain, the more impressive the hero that defeats them.

But, in the back of my mind, I frequently find that I can compare my involuntary mood swings to these theatrical villains. The aforementioned personifying of moods. Then, put these villains on a date with some poor unsuspecting guy and, well....

PMS can completely alter a woman's personality and even appearances just with that wicked chemistry. It's a literal Miss. Jekyll and Miss. Hyde. When I'm hit with these moods of nastiness, sometimes I try to use the more logical side of my brain to at least be cordial but it probably comes across as cold and calculated.
I often despair because I feel like a ticking bomb that nature made.
Ever been in a car wreck? The sickening dread and anxiety that feels like a lead brick dropped in your chest? Then soak a heavy mattress and carry it around, then imagine it in your chest. Then add a general disgust for planet earth and a hair trigger temper followed by agonizing stabbing pains in your abs, back, and general pelvic area. Then do that for two weeks out of every month.
See if you can resist responding to people with death ray.

I have diligently tried to treat this chemical warfare. Sometimes large doses of Vitamin D andCalcium then Magnesium, Potassium, iron, chromium and evening primrose help but results are inconsistent. So until I can master PMS I simply cannot date when the HULK is loose.

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